Redrum versus Nirvana & Boris

[The scene flashes open with the screeching sound of metal rubbing against metal. Over and over again it continues slowly. The sound of a cheerful chortle is heard as the scene begins to fade in. We see an old broken down playground settled quietly into the nighttime darkness. The metal is rusted over and the rubber is rotting out. The camera follows the sound of the screech as we come up slowly on a swing set. The metal chains holding the rubber seats are rusted completely and the rubber seats themselves are rotting away. The camera pans over a few swings where we see PAW's resident cotton candy caper, REDЯUM, swinging happily on one of the swings. He is dressed in his usual attire of ripped carnival stripped pants, two matching wrist bands, mismatched elbow pads, and a pair of oversized Converse All-Stars. He giggles as he continues to swing.]

REDЯUM: Everybodies been asking me the same thing over and over again! Why would the HAPPIEST HERO in PAW turn on his partner? The answer to your question is simply ladies and germs... Nirvana used me! He saw a weak jester and tried to manipulate him into being his little errand boy! His little pet. I had to carry his bags, fetch him drinks, wash his smelly gear. And for what? The honor to be a part of the Original Carnies? No thanks carny.

[The clown keeps his swing up, going higher and higher into the air before jumping off and landing on his feet. As soon as his feet hit the overgrown grass the Plundering Puncherillo does a forward roll onto his rear end. He chuckles as he tilts his head back and slaps the tall grass in front of him. He backs down to his back and continues to chuckle as he speaks.]

REDЯUM: Now we've got this match. The Original Carnies split and face eachother in a dueling Grudge Match! And what's this? A BEAR IS ADDED TO THE MATCH! Please tell me how everybodies favorite clown is supposed to win a match when he not only is at a handicap...... but one of my opponents is a LIVE BEAR?! It's so UNBEARABLE!

[The hilarious humorist brings his knees to his chest before kipping up to his feet. He staggers, but doesn't fall. The clown begins to walk his silly clown walk over towards the jungle gym. He climbs up the small stairs quickly before plopping down to his rear end on the edge of the small jungle gym floor. He looks out at the playground and lets out a sigh before his face painted grin widens, stretching the smile on his face to an extreme size!]

REDЯUM: I'VE GOT IT! A simple bear trap will do the trick! If I plant the trap and leave some Genuine Bear Food out for Boris.... I should be able to catch myself a BEAR! Then with Boris out of the way I can take down Nirvana and finally show the world that everything I worked so hard for.. well... tricked so hard for... wasn't just a waste of time! If Nirvana wants a FIGHT, he's got one!

[The Sultan of Strange swings his legs gleefully before hopping back up to his feet and strutting over to the slides. He sits down on the purple one and giggles before pushing himself forward. The clown slides down and to his feet before doing a roll and popping to his feet, all in one motion. He waves out and bows, completely ignoring the fact that there is nobody there except for him and the cameraman. The wacky wisecracker turns to the camera and flashes a smile.]

REDЯUM: So bring your mask, bring your Bear, bring everything you've got Nirvana. I'll bring my jokes, my clown shoes, and my gags! And we'll have one hell of a party in Purity! The gloves are off and the paint is on! I'm ready to fight for everything I've pranked so hard to get! You walked in here and were put on a shiny golden pedestal. I walked in here and have been fighting since day one. Everyone's been laughing at me and looking at me like I'm just the Court Jester, but this clown is a whole lot more than that! I'll be clowned if I go back down to the losers club you call the Enhancement Talent! I've earned my contract and I intend to keep my jolly John Hancock on the dotted lines!

[The Ringleader struts over to a broken down and rotted picnic table where a bag similar to ol' Saint Nicks famous bag sits on the top. He unties the top and reaches in the bag. He can't seem to find what he's looking for though as the clown hops onto the table and puts his head inside along with both arms. He digs deeper before bending over and putting half of his body in. Eventually we hear a loud "EUREKA" as the clown comes out of the bag. In his hands he holds two things. A make-up kit and a Vinyl copy of the 1991 Album "Nevermind" from the band Nirvana. Over the album though rests an exact replica of Nirvana's mask. The clown smiles as he opens the paint kit and begins to paint over the mask of Nirvana, smudging a silly little clown face over the mask. After a few moments, and quite a few strokes, the clown holds up the masked album cover with a delightful smile spread across not only the mask, but the clowns own face! He reaches into his pocket and pulls out another ingredient before sliding on an oversized oven mitt. The clown snickers as he looks towards the camera while holding up the clown paint covered Nirvana covered Nirvana album.]

REDЯUM: I might've been on the down slopes in PAW as of late, but one thing you should never do is count out a trickster.... we've always got a special trick up our sleeve!

[The jolly joker grabs a mystery bottle from the table and takes a large gulp from it's mouth. He then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a single match before striking it using his thumb. He holds it up towards the masked album and then sprays the contents from his mouth creating a massive cloud of fire which immedietly catches fire to the clown paint covered Nirvana covered Nirvana album, bursting it into flames. The homicidal hilarian drops the masked album onto the floor as he reaches into the bag and pulls out a smaller clear bag of red cotton candy. He sits down on the top of the bench, feet dangling off the sides as he opens the bag and grabs a handful of the delightful deliciousness and shovels it into his mouth. A terrifying crunch is heard as the clown chews up the fluffy fur ball. He begins to howl with sadistic laughter as a thick red liquid begins to drizzle down his chin from his painted mouth. His sadistic laughter continues as he stares at the roaring fire of Nirvana. The camera zooms in on the burning mask as it slowly fades out on the brightened flames.]