Post by admin on Apr 8, 2016 4:12:32 GMT
Alex looked at the OD Green Casio G-Shock on his left wrist his twin brother had given him a few months back when he came to visit. He sighed after finding out it was only two thirty in the morning. Staying awake was the only thing that kept the nightmares away, plus he knew he couldn't sleep anyways so why bother? He glanced over at the card resting on his nightstand that he was handed the other day and took it in his hands. Glancing over the information he threw it back on the nightstand before getting to his feet dressed only in a pair of red checkered boxers. He grabbed his phone and a pair of royal blue sweat pants sliding them on as he headed out the door sliding the phone into his front right pocket. Alex thought about checking in on Travis but since it was the weekend he might still be up and honestly he didn't want to really talk right now, he just wanted to be alone. He passed Munin's room and paused for a moment to take a listen only to find nothing but silence. He made his way past her door quietly and down the stairs before walking into the spacious kitchen towards the refrigerator. He opened the door and pulled out a half full bottle of Whiskey and closed the door behind him before walking over and grabbing a small glass and having a seat at the small kitchen table.
Fuck me man.
His eyes looked over the bottle as he poured himself a shot and placed the bottle down with a thud. This was what his life had become, drinking alone. He tossed back the drink and slammed the glass down. He felt disgusted with himself as he looked at the empty glass resting on front of him.
So this is what I've become? A drunk asshole.
He released his grip on the glass and turned to look at the bottle of Jameson sitting nearby.
You've ruined my life more than once. You've cost me friends, you've cost me relationships, you've cost me my career!
Without thinking he grabbed the bottle and threw it across the kitchen against the nearby wall causing it to shatter upon impact. He put his elbows on the table and rested his face in his hands, running them through his hair as he looked at the table.
This isn't who I am anymore. This can't be who I am. If I...
His voice trailed off a bit as he looked up, his face red from resting in his hands.
After all I've done to her why should I expect anything to fall my way? Now look at me. Part of the reason she left me was because of this bottle and yet here I sit like it's just another day in paradise.
He rose to his feet grabbing the glass off the table and walked to the nearby sink placing the glass inside before turning and resting his back against the adjacent counter top.
I need some help. I can't keep these secrets inside anymore their killing me.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cellphone looking at the time, an hour had past but it was still several hours before the sun would come up. He needed a friend, someone he could talk to, to confide in. He shook his head and closed his eyes for a moment as he rested his hands behind him on the counter top. His brother was deployed overseas but he was out of contact for several days while on his mission. He opened his eyes and grabbed his phone trying to find something to occupy his mind, maybe help him get at least a few hours sleep until the sun came up. Coming across the PAW website he mulled over the different pages finally reading the fallout from the most recent show. To no ones surprise his drinking problem was front and center along with the question of how it would affect his career and his relationship. If he was honest with himself he wondered the same thing and maybe that was why he drank so much. Finally choosing to bite the bullet he pulled up his contacts and scrolled through until finding a name familiar to him but maybe not to others. He hit send and waited for what seemed like an eternity hoping for an answer, a friend.
Mother fucker do you know what time it is?
A smile and show of relief showed on his face.
I need a friend right now Ronnie. I need someone to talk to.
What's up? You okay?
No that's the problem I'm not okay, I'm in a bad way right now and I need a friend. Are you still in town?
Yeah but I'm a little preoccupied if you catch my drift. Found me a PAW honey after the show.
That's fine. Look, just give me a call in the morning then would you?
Listen, give me fifteen minutes and I'll meet you somewhere. Cool?
No it's okay. I'm not trying to bust your balls or guilt you in to anything, I'll be okay until the morning.
Have you slept any? You sound like you've been up all night.
Been up a couple of days now I think. I slept a couple of hours the night before the super show but haven't really slept since save for maybe an hour or so.
Have you talked to Munin about this dude because you might need some serious help.
I can't. If Munin knew....
He stopped himself for a moment before clearing his throat.
If Nin knew about the drinking, the sleepless nights, the nightmares, any of it she'd fire me for being a danger in the ring. Not only that but she'd leave me for good. I need to handle this without her knowing.
Are you stupid Alex? You don't think she already knows? You don't think she can smell the constant alcohol on your breath? You smell like booze before and after a match how can she NOT know about it? Hell you're in the same house how do you think you can hide it? In case you haven't noticed you've got a shitty poker face.
What would you have me do? Tell Nin I've got a problem and deal with the fallout?
Better you tell her than she have to approach you about it wouldn't you think? Either way it's gonna get out. Hell, you've seen the PAW website it's already getting out to the public.
I can handle this Ronnie I know I can.
Listen I'm on my way over right now. I'd offer to meet you somewhere but I'm pretty sure you smell like whiskey right now and with your past the last thing you need is another DUI. I'll pick you up in ten.
Thanks Ronnie I owe you one.
Whatever. Just meet me at the door so I don't have to wake up the neighborhood.
He ended the call and slid the phone back into his pocket before looking at his watch again. He knew Munin would be up soon since the two of them were supposed to go pick up Alexandra Kelly from the airport and show her around town. Munin's routine was like clockwork so he needed to be around when she woke up to avoid arousing any suspicion she might have. Brunch and then drinking all night with two beautiful ladies was his idea of a fun night but he also knew it spelled trouble if he got shit faced again. Hopefully a talk with Ronnie would keep him in check but he knew it wouldn't. No matter how hard he tried he'd be drunk again tonight and one step closer to losing everything.....again.
Fuck me man.
His eyes looked over the bottle as he poured himself a shot and placed the bottle down with a thud. This was what his life had become, drinking alone. He tossed back the drink and slammed the glass down. He felt disgusted with himself as he looked at the empty glass resting on front of him.
So this is what I've become? A drunk asshole.
He released his grip on the glass and turned to look at the bottle of Jameson sitting nearby.
You've ruined my life more than once. You've cost me friends, you've cost me relationships, you've cost me my career!
Without thinking he grabbed the bottle and threw it across the kitchen against the nearby wall causing it to shatter upon impact. He put his elbows on the table and rested his face in his hands, running them through his hair as he looked at the table.
This isn't who I am anymore. This can't be who I am. If I...
His voice trailed off a bit as he looked up, his face red from resting in his hands.
After all I've done to her why should I expect anything to fall my way? Now look at me. Part of the reason she left me was because of this bottle and yet here I sit like it's just another day in paradise.
He rose to his feet grabbing the glass off the table and walked to the nearby sink placing the glass inside before turning and resting his back against the adjacent counter top.
I need some help. I can't keep these secrets inside anymore their killing me.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cellphone looking at the time, an hour had past but it was still several hours before the sun would come up. He needed a friend, someone he could talk to, to confide in. He shook his head and closed his eyes for a moment as he rested his hands behind him on the counter top. His brother was deployed overseas but he was out of contact for several days while on his mission. He opened his eyes and grabbed his phone trying to find something to occupy his mind, maybe help him get at least a few hours sleep until the sun came up. Coming across the PAW website he mulled over the different pages finally reading the fallout from the most recent show. To no ones surprise his drinking problem was front and center along with the question of how it would affect his career and his relationship. If he was honest with himself he wondered the same thing and maybe that was why he drank so much. Finally choosing to bite the bullet he pulled up his contacts and scrolled through until finding a name familiar to him but maybe not to others. He hit send and waited for what seemed like an eternity hoping for an answer, a friend.
Mother fucker do you know what time it is?
A smile and show of relief showed on his face.
I need a friend right now Ronnie. I need someone to talk to.
What's up? You okay?
No that's the problem I'm not okay, I'm in a bad way right now and I need a friend. Are you still in town?
Yeah but I'm a little preoccupied if you catch my drift. Found me a PAW honey after the show.
That's fine. Look, just give me a call in the morning then would you?
Listen, give me fifteen minutes and I'll meet you somewhere. Cool?
No it's okay. I'm not trying to bust your balls or guilt you in to anything, I'll be okay until the morning.
Have you slept any? You sound like you've been up all night.
Been up a couple of days now I think. I slept a couple of hours the night before the super show but haven't really slept since save for maybe an hour or so.
Have you talked to Munin about this dude because you might need some serious help.
I can't. If Munin knew....
He stopped himself for a moment before clearing his throat.
If Nin knew about the drinking, the sleepless nights, the nightmares, any of it she'd fire me for being a danger in the ring. Not only that but she'd leave me for good. I need to handle this without her knowing.
Are you stupid Alex? You don't think she already knows? You don't think she can smell the constant alcohol on your breath? You smell like booze before and after a match how can she NOT know about it? Hell you're in the same house how do you think you can hide it? In case you haven't noticed you've got a shitty poker face.
What would you have me do? Tell Nin I've got a problem and deal with the fallout?
Better you tell her than she have to approach you about it wouldn't you think? Either way it's gonna get out. Hell, you've seen the PAW website it's already getting out to the public.
I can handle this Ronnie I know I can.
Listen I'm on my way over right now. I'd offer to meet you somewhere but I'm pretty sure you smell like whiskey right now and with your past the last thing you need is another DUI. I'll pick you up in ten.
Thanks Ronnie I owe you one.
Whatever. Just meet me at the door so I don't have to wake up the neighborhood.
He ended the call and slid the phone back into his pocket before looking at his watch again. He knew Munin would be up soon since the two of them were supposed to go pick up Alexandra Kelly from the airport and show her around town. Munin's routine was like clockwork so he needed to be around when she woke up to avoid arousing any suspicion she might have. Brunch and then drinking all night with two beautiful ladies was his idea of a fun night but he also knew it spelled trouble if he got shit faced again. Hopefully a talk with Ronnie would keep him in check but he knew it wouldn't. No matter how hard he tried he'd be drunk again tonight and one step closer to losing everything.....again.